OMG guys this has just been an excellent week for me!
- My experiment finally worked and I got a Western Blott to come out.
- My movies came yesterday - Perks of being a Wallflower and Scott Pilgrim vs the World.
- I got my letters! (I shall take a pic eventually)
- I finished Dragon Age: Origins (Again after my PS3 died and I lost all my save data and I wanted to have that for when the third one comes out whenever that is.)
- I pretty much ran the brotherhood meeting for my Frat.
- I had dinner, accidentally, with a crush I’ve had for years and it went excellently and he was the one who asked if I wanted to have dinner and idk if he’s gay or not but I don’t really care it was awesome.
I’m getting my own “apartment” next school year, it’s still owned by the school but it’ll be just me living there in a complex of other students, and I really want to decorate it and look really nice, like an actual home. So I want to hang pictures but I want to take them. The problem is I’ve never really done much photography and I have a shit camer so I’d have to borrow my Dad’s.
So, I’m sort of kind of seeing someone right now… and he’s amazing and I’m really happy. I hope I don’t fuck things up.
Registered for classes today… Every single upper level bio course was taken. Ridiculous. But! I get to just use my lab work that I do anyway as a class! Woot!
I’m sorry but
how sad is this. My roommates and all our mutual “friends” are holed up in one tiny room with the door closed and locked instead of in the common room just hanging out because one person has issues with me. I’m sorry, if you need to go that far out of your way to not include me, that’s just sad.
FUCK! My roommates just ditched me for rooming next year… now I have to find something by myself…
About ready to punch my “friends” all in the face!
I’m… lonely today…
Guess who was right? They did ditch me. Said they were coming up here to drink, and have yet to text me back; I texted them hours ago. Not to mention my roommate went down to their room with all of their booze and said he was coming right back, but well, clearly that didn’t happen. All I can say right now is fuck them and I am so pissed off and depressed right now. It’s just such bullshit and I’m so tired of being alone!
Today’s just one of those bad days… I haven’t had one in a long long time, it kinda sucks. I just feel… lonely, like my friends plan on ditching me tonight… which I hope they won’t but… I dunno, I’m just very lonely right now. I hate when I get into these moods; I haven’t had one in such a long time too.
I was having such a great day… and then it just ended not very well… augh…
I’ve decided to finally put Artist Vs Poet side by side with the events of my life that they match with…
Gateway - Coming out to my parents
To Hell with the Letdown - Pretty much just my whole college experience
We’re All the Same - My doubts about choosing the right college throughout freshman year.
Damn Rough Night - First time getting drunk with friends and how amazing it was.
Doin’ Alright - Me falling for Mike and our first night at a club together
He’s Just Not Me - Mike informing me he was getting back with his ex
Adorable - Me falling for Paul
Alive - Paul telling me he doesn’t want to be with me.
Miserable Loving You - First few weeks after Paul dumped me.
Rescue - Me not getting over Paul and all our talks about it.
Favorite Fix - my… slight obsession with Paul as a direct result of my feelings
So Much I Never Said - Coming to terms that Paul didn’t want me
Wasn’t Worth It - When Paul and I hooked up again after I thought I was over him
Unconscious Reality / Broke but not Broken - My bouts of depression
Car Crash - Realization that Paul isn’t good for me and he won’t make me happy
Giving Yourself Away - My personal view of myself and relationships now, except without the person who cares about me
So Yeah… that was literally every song from their Damn Rough Night EP to their current singles. Every single song describes some aspect of my life, some perfectly…
Today is just going to be one of those days where I just don’t want to be alone at all… like I’m going to need to be with people all day and even then I’ll still feel lonely because I’m lonely in the relationship sense not the friendship sense… augh I hate these days.
I’m supposed to go to the gay club with my friends this week because it’s been ages since I’ve gone and we keep pushing it back and my friend from home is coming up but… I have a feeling my friends are going to bail on it… Idk, it’s just frustrating. We went out to a straight club last weekend which I don’t really enjoy that much. So why can’t my gay friend and girl friends go to a gay club with me? They just don’t seem too into going this weekend and it’s bullshit because I always do that they want to do and I never get to go where I want to go, it’s not fair and I hate it. I don’t care if I’m being selfish, I deserve a night to do what I want to do, it’s not like I ask or even want to go every fucking week… augh, maybe I’m just paranoid.
I can tell today is going to be a rough day already… I’m feeling incredibly lonely already… great.